The poems I’ve posted thus far, Thoughts on Conversing with the Unsaved and Sonnets of Suffering, appear to be some of the most popular writings on Defy Augury, so I thought you might like it if I wrote another. Honestly, one of the best ways I communicate my feelings is through poetry (no wonder, considering the fact that I’ll do anything to get my hands on a Shakespeare play:); that’s why much of my poetic repertoire is drawn from personal experience. This particular piece was inspired by my hatred of and frustration with my flesh…a topic to which simple prose could never do justice.
O what woe and wretchedness mutilates my flesh!
This rent-haired, obscene monster, all of earth,
Hypocrite saint, arrogant sinner,
Obstinate, crude, rotting tent
Fatal and odious, crowned in demonic hate!
How is it that you appear so sainted
Ling’ring black in the face of white Glory–
Feigning holiness, gulling angels,
And furthering your shame?
O hell-bound wretch! You are the serpent in Eden’s garden,
You are seduced by the Devil’s grasp–
Now all your reeking heart resembles
Is flaming Genna’s morbidity!
O, help!–I say I love the Savior
And long to abide with Him,
Yet my tongue embodies words ill-used and tried!
I vomit curses on my fiercest enemy,
I shower blessings on the brethren;
I cry to heaven, “Mercy! Mercy!”
I scorn my neighbor–“You are damned to flame!”
Surely I am what nothing is made of,
And all hope past Earth is hopeless without a sacred Someone.
Please purge me, warm me, flood me with Your presence, O Father–
For You are love, and I am hate.
Give me a tongue divine, a life of white,
And separate my self from soul–
I am vapor, filth, and dust.
O Sovereign Lord, kill my self
In your white glory, please–
Black ashes make of pitiful me.
October 18, 2017